In case you haven't noticed, I am always considering my role as a mother, mostly because motherhood (for me) often feels complex. I know I am late to the game, and like Wendy, my thoughts are not an address to the offense many have taken to Sister Beck's talk. The purpose of this post is to publicly ( the public being my 5 readers and anyone else who happens to wander upon my blog) proclaim that I now know that I know.
My heart already knew, but sometimes my head was turned by talk of worthwhile activities which I am unable to participate in because of 2 small children and a breastfeeding baby. I've been tempted by voices which tell me to stop breastfeeding, 11 months is long enough. I've been tempted by those who have told me 3 children is more then enough, that I am old, and that my childbearing skills are lacking to begin with. I am tempted by all the 'good' things I could be doing with my time instead of caring for another newborn and devoting myself as a homemaker.
But I know, and now I've been reminded that I know. I don't know if I will regret not having the opportunity right now to read more books, run more miles, see a movie, go to parties, or go on vacations. I know for sure that I will regret not having one more child. I know that I will regret not rising to my full possible stature as a mother. Sister Beck's talk invigorated me. I felt her words were timely. I felt the Lord answering my questions through her. I will proudly wear the title homemaker. Is there anything more important that I could be doing right now?
Besides, I believe some of my homemaking 'fruits' to be beautiful works of wonder.
22 comments:
Beautiful, Martha. And Amen. I'm glad you are still breast feeding. I plan on doing it, even with adopted children. I'm glad you don't think three is more than enough (acknowledging that every person has their own "right" about that one--and I'll be grateful for even one). I'm glad you see the sacrifices you are making as for a worthy cause . . . etc., etc., etc.
Beautiful fruits indeed.
Could you be more gorgeous?? I agree and felt invigorated by Sis Beck's talk. I am very concerned about your visit from the police...I saw them roaring up the street and didn't realize they were going to your house. What's up!?
And you've been tagged. Just add it to your list of too many things to do.
I have read some of the backlash concerning Sis. Beck's talk, and it makes me wonder if we all heard the same thing. She validated what I have chosen to do with my life for which I am grateful.
Don't you wish you could bite some of that fruit?
Ditto on the 'you look gorgeous'. Seriously!
I LOVE LOVE LOVED that talk. I seriously loved it. I don't understand any backlash. Seriously? Ok, I've used that word three times now. But SERIOUSLY! It's disturbing.
That talk rocked. I think about it all the time. I loved the first one (women's conference) and loved the second one just as much and I have changed the way I do things as a mother the last couple of weeks as a result. I'm trying to be much more tuned in.
Wendy-my thing is, if I am still able to breastfeed and it is what is best, then I'm going to continue. It is an inconvenience but it isn't forever. It is a personal decision though and I would not want someone to feel bad b/c they decided to not breastfeed for an extended period of time.
I guess they are not just my fruits, I should acknowledge that I had some help from my husband and from God.
laurie-it's really no big deal (the fire) and so the construction workers fault working behind my home. I'll try to do the post tom. And thank you, but I believe that that's the pot calling the kettle black.
celia fae-that's exactly how I felt. I felt validated for my choice.
And yes, I want to take a bite ALL THE TIME!
rochelle-you too are calling the kettle black. I have some serious hair envy that has to do with your locks.
Did your husband tell you about Pres. Monson's story about redheads from priesthood session?
I actually really liked that talk too, because people should talk about how great it is to have babies! I really believe that you never regret the kids you have (OK, maybe occasionally), but you always regret that one you didn't.
I just wish I had spaced my kids out a little better... in order to enjoy each individually of course (a struggle with twins!)
first off...where is this post about the police???
and most importantly, i love your post. you are an incredible wife and mother and individual and i am grateful to know you and what you stand for. thank you for reminding me the joys of being a mother!
Martha, he did. Pretty funny.
I totally dreamt about you last night. I was with you and asked you where you were moving and you said, "Mexico" with a Spanish accent. And I realized that you were Latin but I'd never noticed it on the blog cause I'd never heard you talk. Pretty funny.
Martha, I was thinking last night and this morning that what I wrote about breast-feeding sounded preachy, that I hadn't meant to, and that I wish I had written more along the lines of I'm glad you're doing it if it's right for you.
I know it's not right for everybody (and the timing is different for all). What I really am glad for you is that you are doing it because it feels right, even though others may tell you you should stop.
Also, I have no idea how long I'll really do it with my own children, or if they'll like it at all, so I can't set my heart, really. I know it's different for every woman and every child.
I don't think what you said sounded preachy at all Wendy. I understand what you are saying though. I feel pretty passionate about breastfeeding but I know there are reasons one cannot breastfeed so I just am careful. You were not preachy though.
Paige-I feel the same way about spacing them out. I didn't have multiples but I had 3, 3 and under. If I really want a 4th I'd better do it quick and that would make it 4 children 5 and under, which isn't a big deal for some women but for my body (and risk factors) it is, so there is some conflict. But I still feel I would regret not having one more.
Rochell-I had not considered Mexico...
to those of you who live up here, I have to give credit to Mckenzie Hanson for the second picture. I swear she must have airbrushed it b/c my skin that close up is NOT 16 year old skin.
Martha, you are so right. . . I plan on breastfeeding because I know it's nutricious and delicious.
Andy-people are going to start thinking my family is more weird than it really is.
Good luck on the breastfeeding thing.
I, too, felt inspired by Sister Beck's talk. I felt that she was very blunt, and those who took offense probably needed to take offense. I get "caught up" sometimes, too, in what the world would have me do but I know I'm doing the most important thing I could possibly be doing right now. Now the question is - was she inspiring me to get going on #3?!
your blog is an inspiration to me! so thank you! I love that second picture of you and lulu, you are stunning!
Andy (aren't you Martha's brother?), I heard about a man who wanted to experience breast feeding, so he literally THOUGHT one breast into lactation and nursed his baby. So . . . You COULD do it if you really WANTED to. Is that freaky or what? None of that going on at my house.
Oh Wendy, don't encourage him :)
Martha, good for you! I also want plenty of kids and have never been happier than I am now. I feel like becoming a mother was the best career move I ever made.
I love Andy's comments. I don't think I have ever met him but the comments always make me laugh and think he would be good to have at a dinner party to keep the conversation lively.
Emily, I think you may have met him. I don't know. Lori knows him, I think they used to hang out a bit. He is pretty funny, and obviously he knows he's witty.
I really liked her talk too. I also really liked Pres. Monson's talk (?) about good, better and best.
I need to read through my notes again, but I loved that there was something in there about simple is good. Things don't need to be embellished.
Really good conference.
Loved your post. I loved Sister Beck's talk. I needed it. I left the General R.S. Meeting kind of upset. I wasn't mad at anything said, just at what was not said. Sometimes I feel that SAHM's get left out, I needed the reassurance from Sister Beck that my decsision to be at home, ect. was a good one.
Wow... So much reading on such a great post. I used to say that I am "just a mom" and it would even come out in a wierd little mumble. At some point, I decided that I would be proud. That motherhood is a sacred gift, calling and responsibility. That there is nothing that I could be doing that would trump the importance of being at home with my beautiful babies. It is right for me - maybe not for all, but Sister Beck's talk reassured my own feelings and helped me to count my many blessings...Martha you are as beautiful inside as you are on the out...
Post a Comment